329 days without alcohol. Almost a year of absolute sobriety.
Some people ask me how I do it. How I don’t relapse. How I stay consistent.
The truth? I fell in love with the process. I rewired my brain to enjoy discipline—not just in fitness, but in every aspect of my life.
Because discipline isn’t suffering. It’s liberation.
When I gave up alcohol, I didn’t just quit drinking—I rewired my brain to function without it. I trained myself to enjoy every sober morning, every clear-headed workout, every moment where I chose control over impulse. The same way I push myself in the gym is the same way I push myself to stay away from alcohol. The process is the reward.
If I waited for motivation, I would’ve failed. If I focused only on the result, I wouldn’t have lasted. What worked? Loving the grind itself.
If we want to develop unshakable discipline—whether in fitness, work, or personal battles like quitting alcohol—we need to master dopamine, mindset, and self-control. Let’s break it down.
Dopamine & Motivation: Why "Loving the Process" Works
🔹Our Brain is Wired for Anticipation, Not Just Reward
Dr. Robert Sapolsky (Stanford neurobiologist) studied dopamine and discovered that the biggest dopamine spike doesn’t happen when we get the reward—it happens when we anticipate it.
Example:
The excitement before eating your favorite meal is usually greater than the satisfaction after eating it.
The anticipation of hitting a PR in the gym feels better than the actual moment it happens.
The buildup to a major life event is often more exciting than the event itself.
If we associate excitement with the process (not just the result), discipline becomes effortless.
In my sobriety journey, the real reward wasn’t reaching "X number of days without drinking"—it was waking up clear-headed, feeling strong, and knowing I was in control every single day.
🔹 The “Dopamine Prediction Error” & Why Goals Lose Their Magic
Studies show that when we finally achieve a goal, dopamine actually drops.
This is called dopamine prediction error—the brain expected more excitement than it got.
Example:
You dream of hitting a 200lb deadlift. You finally hit it. Instead of feeling permanent satisfaction, you think, "That’s it?" and chase the next number.
You stay sober for 100 days. Instead of feeling a huge sense of accomplishment, you think, "Okay… now what?"
This is why many people hit big goals—then feel empty. The real joy was in the journey, not the achievement. We must train ourselves to find fulfillment in the daily grind, not just in the end goal.
For me, every sober morning is a win. Every workout is a win. Every day I choose discipline over indulgence, I am winning.
The "Growth Mindset" vs. The "Fixed Mindset"
🔹 Growth vs. Fixed Mindset
Dr. Carol Dweck (Stanford psychologist) discovered that people with a growth mindset—who enjoy challenges and effort—become more resilient than those who focus only on outcomes.
Fixed mindset people believe talent and success are fixed—so if they don’t see results fast, they quit.
Growth mindset people thrive in discomfort—they enjoy learning, improving, and overcoming struggles.
If we focus only on results, failure feels like the end. If we focus on effort, failure is just part of progress.
In my fitness journey, I didn’t start strong—I built strength. In my sobriety, I didn’t wake up "fully recovered"—I built discipline through daily choices.
Some Wisdom About Discipline & the Process
🔹 Nietzsche: “Become Who You Are”
Friedrich Nietzsche believed that struggle and challenge are what make life meaningful.
He argued that suffering in pursuit of mastery isn't something to avoid—it’s something to embrace.
If we hate the struggle, we’re doomed to be miserable. If we learn to love it, we’ll thrive.
🔹 The Stoics: Discipline = Freedom
Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and Epictetus all preached that discipline is the key to true freedom.
If we’re ruled by comfort and pleasure, we're actually a slave to them. If we master ourselves, we become free.
Enjoying discomfort makes us unstoppable. If we rely on motivation, we’ll always be weak.
MAG-REALTALKAN TAYO:
✔ Focus on the Process, Not the Prize.
Toxic Mindset:
“Mag-eexercise ako para pag nakita ko ex ko, who you sya saken.”
“Gusto kong yumaman para matahimik na ang mga kamag-anak kong mahilig manghamak.”
“Magpapapayat ako para sa reunion! Dapat ako ang pinakapalung-palo sa lahat.”
Tamang Mindset:
“Mag-eexercise ako for my overall health.”
“Gusto kong yumaman for financial security.”
“Kelangan ko magdiet para hindi hello highblood, goodbye. Importante present ako sa reunion at sa mga susunod pa.”
*Hindi nakasalalay sa validation ng iba ang dahilan para kumilos tayo. Ang matibay na foundation ay idinidikta ng mas malalim nating dahilan sa mga sarili natin.
✔ Micro-Progress = Macro-Results.
Toxic Mindset:
“Wag muna mag-business. Wala pa malaking puhunan.”
“Hindi pa ako mag-aaral ng English hangga’t wala akong full online course.”
“Hindi pa ako magsusulat ng libro hangga’t hindi buo ang plot.”
Tamang Mindset:
“Magsisimula ako ng business kahit maliit lang, at palalakihin ko ito unti-unti.”
“Mag-aaral ako ng English kahit isang bagong salita lang kada araw.”
“Gagawa ako ng book kahit isang paragraph lang bawat araw hanggang mabuo ko ito.”
*Small steps lang kada araw. Walang ibang perfect timing kundi ngayon na.
✔ Rewire Dopamine: No External Validation Needed.
Toxic Mindset:
“Dapat bida-bida ako sa mga gym post ko. More heart dapat. Sayang naman membership at oras ko dito.”
“Gagawa ako ng TikTok video pero dapat mag-viral agad, or wag na lang kung di lang din benta.”
“Pag walang nag-like sa bagong post ko tungkol sa achievements ko, pakawalang kwenta ko.”
Tamang Mindset:
“Masaya ako sa fitness progress ko kahit walang ibang nakakapansin.”
“Gagawa ako ng TikTok videos dahil gusto ko gawin, hindi dahil gusto kong sumikat.”
“Hindi ko kailangang i-post ang lahat ng achievements ko. Ang mahalaga, satisfied ako.”
*Kapag masyado kang nakadepende sa likes, comments, at validation ng iba, madali kang madidiscourage. Ang tunay na self-improvement ay hindi kailangang i-broadcast para lang masabing totoo.
✔ Love the Boring Days.
Toxic Mindset:
“Ayoko mag-workout today, kawalang gana.”
"Need ko magwalwal today bago ako magstart ng boring na alcohol-free lifestyle."
Tamang Mindset:
"Workout is life pa din. Ke tinatamad o hindi, gym pa din."
"Simulan na ang boring na process ngayon. Kung gusto ko, kaya ko at kung magiging boring ang buong 365 days, so be it! 1 year alcohol-free day one now!"
*Hindi araw-araw exciting. Keep trying everyday...keep winning everyday.
Love the Process!
Most people fail at discipline because they see the process as suffering instead of a privilege.
We don’t suffer through the process—we find joy in it. If we learn to love the grind, we’ll never stop progressing.
Discipline isn’t about suffering. It’s about rewiring our brain to love the work. Let's fall in love with the process, commit to it, then marry success.
